Friday, December 24, 2010

Finding perspective just in time

It's time to start writing again. It has been too long.

A lot has happened since I last posted with any regularity. Life changing events that I may or may not get into at a later date. What I will say is that I am glad to be back.

It has been too long.

Christmas is tomorrow and I couldn't be happier. All four of my daughters, my brother and sister-in-law, two of Jen's kids, and her sister and mother will all be at my house for dinner tonight. Jen and I no doubt will be going nuts with all the company, yet, neither of us would have it any other way.

The fact that Jen and her kids will be over is a huge victory for me. I almost lost her two months ago. Seems she could no longer handle my inability to handle coaching football in the no-win situation I was in.

I got so bad during this last football season that I alienated every one I worked for, with, and those who worked under me. And, in the process, I forgot those who were most important, my girls and Jen.

My girls never really complained. They continued to go to practice day after day with me and put up with my yelling at them for not leaving me alone while I coached. They did it in weather that ranged from hotter than hell in the late summer, to colder than shit in the early winter.

And, they have done it their whole lives while never complaining that my career has kept them from playing youth sports, taking piano lessons, or cheer leading for their schools with their friends. To them, me coaching football was what WE did as a family. But, it shouldn't be that way.

I should be the one in the stands watching them.

It took looking over at my girls during a practice in late October that it was time for a change. They were bundled up and huddled together while trying to do their homework. And, that change meant that Coachdad was about to be just Dad.

Ironically, a week after I made my decision to walk away from the only job I have ever wanted, Jen informed me that she would be moving out in November. I was told I allowed the job to affect me to the point that she can no longer handle being around me and that for her own sanity, she had to leave.

Thankfully, she didn't leave. I was able to convince her that the Brett that she fell in love would be back. The Brett that had perspective, that was able to put family and loved ones ahead of everything else, and the Brett that was able to make her laugh endlessly.

That Brett is still here and isn't going anywhere. And, like I said earlier, I am glad to be back.


  1. It takes a smart man to realize what he's going to lose, and then make the necessary changes. Congratulations.

  2. Glad to see you are back!! You have been through alot.....glad it seems to have worked out!!

  3. I am so glad to read that you realized what was at stake before you completely lost everyone dearest to your heart. So many times I have seen ay too many people loose and then try to make changes in their lives. That we could term a s being a day late and a dollar short. One word of advice if I may offer it to you... If you ever start regretting the choice that you made, always picture in your mind what it was like before and Where it was headed before the change.

    Glad to see that you are back to writing. I was gone for quite a spell too and just recently came back to my blog. Wishing you and yours a very Merry Christmas and the Happiest of New Years.

  4. Glad you're back. And you're a very lucky man indeed. :D

  5. Oh my goodness this post made me cry. Good for you. Amen to realizations and heroic moves to save the day.

    Glad to see that you're back. And I'm sure everyone else is too.


  6. Welcome back! And OHMIGOSH your girls look SO big!!!

  7. Add me to the list of readers who is SO glad to see you back. I think of you often and wondered about the lapse. I love the photo!

    I really get how much work relationships take, and continue to take... and how GOOD a loving, healthy relationship feels. Yeah!

  8. This is awesome. Sometimes it takes us a while to see what we have or could be missing. Us lucky ones figure it out before we lose it!
    Hope you had a Very Merry Christmas!

  9. This post makes me so happy - I freaking love moments of realisation like that! Good to have you back!

  10. Good to have you back. Can't wait to hear more about the next phase of your life.

  11. Merry Christmas ! Jen is beautiful ! Glad you worked it out !

  12. I am laughing and crying at the same time while I've read your blog for the last 30 minutes! My husband is also a high school football and baseball coach who was blessed with sweet little girls and everything pink that comes with...
    Great blog!
    I'm a terrible blogger... I can't even figure out how to comment on this and stay signed in, so I have to do it as anonymous and then follow you because I'll never figure out how to find your blog again... I really shouldn't blog stalk people unsupervised. Ha!