Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Wordful Wednesday

I am not typically a sentimental person. I tend to live in the moment and don't hold onto mementos from the past.

That all changed when I saw the picture of my oldest daughter and I together in our football garb. It is a picture that I look at numerous times during the day and one that can bring me out of any funk I may be in.

Kern is the person who taught me what true love is supposed to be. Before she came into my life, love was something that I hoped to receive, and not always something that I looked to give. She changed that the first time I held her in my arms with her blue eyes looking into mine. I had never seen anything more beautiful in my life than those blue eyes.

Two days after she was born, I decided to put a hold on my dreams of being a head football coach and became a stay-at-home father. I would have never imagined that walking away from football and teaching would have been such an easy rode for me to take. It was a decision I never regretted and I am so thankful I made considering the relationship with her mother and I did not work out. It gave me two years of nine-hour days to learn how to be a father and how to truly love.

I owe everything I am as a father to Kern.

I went back to teaching after that time with Kern and started a new life with another woman. I had three more daughters with her before that relationship also came to an end. Today, those three daughters spend the majority of their time with me at my home. Kern is blessed to have a very loving mother and she typically spends every other weekend with us. I often worry that Kern is being cheated of having a relationship with her father that her sisters have with me. It is during those times that I look back when she was a toddler and try and rekindle moments of us together with no interuptions from anyone else.

Times like the two of us together with arms around each other on the football field captured in the picture. Just looking at it motivates me to create more moments like that every day.

She deserves that from me.
(For more Wordful Wednesdays go to Seven Clown Circus)

24 comments:

  1. Aww that's sweet. I have so many memories like that myself. Before you have children you try to imagine what that will be like, but nothing prepares you for that absolute unconditional love. You give it and you feel it in return. There's nothing like it.

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  2. What a wonderful post. I think every parent (single or otherwise) struggles to know if they are giving all that they could of themselves. At the end of the day you have the picture that shows you do give everything and your kids thrive because of it.

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  3. I'm am in awe. What a fabulous post!! You most certainly made my day a lot brighter from reading this....you go daddy!!!

    My W W is about a family movie that I've watched several times, but just last time, I saw something that I've never seen before...can you see it? Come on over and test your vision skills.

    Happy Wednesday.

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  4. That was beautiful and from the lovely words you've written here, I'll bet your moments with Kern ARE making wonderful memories.

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  5. What a wonderful story about your daughter. Your love shines through.

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  6. She is beautiful...I love that she loves football!
    Our daughter loves football and is an avid or is that rabid Gator Fan!!!

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  7. Wow. What a topic. I just wrote about my relationship with my dads on my blog last night.

    I can tell you from experience that even if it's only every other weekend, as long as you remain a constant presence in your daughter's life, you will always be her 'Daddy.' No one can replace that relationship, and it sounds like you are a great Dad.

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  8. Well Coach, thanks for getting me a little choked up this morning. This past year I gain two step-daughters after already having 3 boys. It's been an experience and a half as I've learned (and still am) how special daughters are and how much of an impact I already have on their life. If I hadn't been a SAHD, I may have not appreciated this as much as I do.

    Your sacrifices in your career will not go unnoticed by your kids even if you don't think they did. Great post.

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  9. This was such a great post. It totally made my day. What a blessing. She is a sweetie.

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  10. DAMN, DAMN, DAMN!!!! LOSE your word verification, please!! I just lost my (very clever) comment. DAMN. Stupid Blogger!

    Anyway, I said that I TOLD you you were a good mom... err... dad... Mom-Dad. Dad-Mom. Parent. Someday you'll realize I'm always right. Like with the word verification. You don't need it. And it hates me. And I don't want to stop commenting. So lose it! K? Love ya.

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  11. That's just plain beautiful. Really warmed my heart!

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  12. Great picture and wow, a stay at home father, good for you!

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  13. I love reading what you write about your daughters your love for them is so obvious even to those who live many many miles away from you and who have never even seen you other then pics you posted on this site. The love you have for those girls is the BEST gift you can ever give to them. One day they will tell you that them selves!!

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  14. What a great memory to capture! Awesome picture:-)

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  15. Your words are as sweet as your memories.

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  16. You are such an amazing dad! It really shows in all of your posts.

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  17. This is such a great post! (And a really lovely picture, too!)
    Thanks for stopping by and saying hello... I had no clue you're part of the hot dad bloggers along with heinous and irish gumbo! You're in great company!

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  18. What a beautiful-beautiful story!! your love for your oldest daughter reminds me of my hubby and our oldest...he always says there is something special and different about their relationship...she saved him. thanks for dropping by my blog!! It's nice to meet you!

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  19. great story and pic! see what i mean... sensitive but not sissy-fied! :)

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  20. This is a lovely post. All your girls are so lucky to have you as their father. I grew up apart from my father. He remarried, & had a second family. When he died I felt more grief stricken than most, because I knew I would never get the chance to know him.

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  21. This will most definitely be a photo that your little girl will cherish for the rest of her life. :)

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  22. I can't imagine not having my children living with me and I hope it never occurs.

    Your post is very touching; I'm sure Kern knows how much she means to you and, if not, one day she may trip upon this post and discover it herself: an advantage of blogging.

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  23. What a great father you must be, reading your posts really touched my heart...I'm not even really sure how I found my way here but I am glad I did. Not all dads are like you, I know.

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  24. What a great post about your relationship with Kern and how you started off being a Dad. I love it! :)

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